To Russland with Mung
by CaptHyatt
Summary: When Mung Daal's Catering Company is requested to make a Russian dish, they are missing a very important ingredient. So they have to journey to Russland in order to get it. New adventure, new friends.
1. The Motherland Calls

Disclaimer: Yet again, I in no way own Chowder or anything related to it.

The following event take place 2 years before ADO

Note: I will refer to Russia as Russland and Russia

Threesday, Mung Daal's Catering Company, Marzipan City:

"Ok gang! Today we are going to be making Okroshka!" Mung announced, looking at the order ticket that Truffled had just brought in. "Radda Radda?" "Yeah Mung, what is Okrocka?" Chowder asked, butchering the pronunciation. Mung pinched his brow, "Chowder, it's pronounced Ok-rosh-ka… And it is a Russlandish cold soup… Normally saved for very special occasions." Mung explained to his confused 12-year old apprentice. "Basically…" Mung started, opening his foreign foods cookbook. "We need… Sour milk." Schnitzel walked over to the refrigerator and opened the door. He picked up the carton of milk and tasted it, "Oh! Radda!" He exclaimed, covering his mouth. "Check! Now, we need some meat… Chowder! Get the Roast Moast!" "Got it!" Chowder yelled, running over to the fridge and knocking Schnitzel over. "Radda Radda!" He scowled. "Whoops, sorry Schnitzel." Chowder apologized. The two took the ingredients to Mung, who started mixing them in the bowl. "Now, we need some Chervil." Mung read. "What's that?" Chowder asked, walking up behind Mung.

"It's a special herb used in Russland for medical purposes… We will have to see if Gazpacho has any." The trio placed everything on hold and headed towards the farmer's market. "Hey Gazpacho! Anything new happening?" Mung asked as they walked up to his stand. "I did two push up's today!" "Congrats! Maybe try for three?" "Whoa! Whoa… I don't want to kill myself… So what can I help you with today?" Gazpacho asked. "Do you happen to have any Chervil? Need some for Okroshka soup." Mung explained, pulling out his money purse. "Chervil, Mr. Daal? That's a very fancy ingredient, only grown in the cold mountains of Russland… Why does a petty chef like you need it?" A female voice said… "_Endive._" Mung hissed. "I already have my fancy ingredient." Panini said as she ran over to Chowder. "No… I must resist the expected catchphrase! Back I say!" Chowder yelled. "Yeah Mung, that only grows in Russland, if you're going to make a perfect Okroshka soup, you need to get it." Gazpacho stated. "You're making Okroshka! Ha! You can't even make a burple nurple right!" Ms. Endive exclaimed. "Woman! I will prove you wrong as always! Chowder, Schnitzel, we are going to Russland!" Mung said as he grabbed Chowder by his shirt. "Oh radda radda… Ra." Schnitzel mumbled. "Yay! We're going on a trip!" Chowder yelled while raising his arms in the air. Panini caught up to the three chefs. "You know Chowder, I've heard that the mountains in Russland are so romantic." She exclaimed, trying to grab Chowder's hand. "Really? Do you have to make everything so lovey-dovey? Besides, you're not even in this story." Chowder stated. "Aw… Ok, see you when you get back… You better NOT talk to ANY girls while you are gone… If you do… I'll kill you." Panini hissed at Chowder, who really wasn't paying attention.

They arrived at the shmairport thiry minutes later after making a quick trip to the catering company to pack for a week's stay. "Yes… We need three tickets to Russland, leaving within the next two hours please." Mung asked the salesperson. "Alright… That will be twenty-one hundred dollaps." Mung reached into his pocket and pulled out his checkbook. "Here is fourteen hundred… Schnitzel, pay your ticket." "RADDA RADDA?" Schnitzel yelled. "You don't expect me to pay for your ticket? I barley have enough to pay for Chowders and mine." "Radda… radda ra radda radda rad radda radda radda." Schnitzel mumbled as he handed his payment over. "Alright… you are all set, you going to carry those bags on?" She asked, pointing to their luggage. "Yeah, I guess so." Mung answered. "Well, ok. Your flight leaves at seven thirty, gate B seventeen. Have a nice flight." "Thank you nice lady!" Chowder said as they walked towards security. They walked up to the metal detector, noticing though the security guard was asleep in his chair. "Someone should wake him up… That's not safe." Mung commented, walking through the gate. Schnitzel and Chowder came through next with no issues.

"Let's see… B seventeen. Wow! I think we chose the right security checkpoint. It's right there." Chowder noticed, pointing towards the gate. "Radda radda." Schnitzel said, walking towards a bookstore, he needed something to read on that long 12-hour flight… He couldn't take Chowder for that long. "Alright dear, remember, the flight leaves in two hours… Chowder! Where are you going?" Mung yelled at the boy. "I'm going to get some food! I know, two hours!" He responded with. "Well… I guess I'm by myself…. Laaaadies!" Mung said, starting to squat. Chowder was standing in line at Burger Stop, "Yeah… I'll have five double cheeseburgers please." He asked the server. "Haha, sounds like some vone has an appetite." Someone spoke from behind. Chowder turned around to see a teenager standing there. "I guess you could say that. I'm Chowder." Chowder said. "Da, I'm Vladimir Petrov, at your service." He responded, shaking Chowder's hand. "Huh, is that a food?" Chowder asked, grabbing his meal. "A food? No, it isn't." Vladimir responded, sitting down across from Chowder. "Sounded weird… Anyway, where are you heading?" Chowder asked, shoving the first burger into his mouth. "I am going back to Russia, been away from the motherland for too long." Vladimir answered. "Russia? Oh, you must mean Russland… You aren't from a round here are you?" "Well, I just did move here, been in Vineyard for a few years, this was the only city that had an shmairport."

"Anyway, my master and our worker are going to Russland as well, we are going to be looking for Chervil, we need it for Okroshka." Chowder explained, eating the last cheeseburger. "Ah, I know someone who grows that. I can help you guys when we get there if you need it." Chowder thought about all of the times that him and Mung had gotten lost, maimed, beaten, or anything else. "Yeah… we could probably use your help." He finally stated. Schnitzel had just gotten back to the gate when Chowder and Vladimir came from the restaurant. "Hey Chowder!" Mung exclaimed. "Whoa, what happened to you?" Chowder asked, noticing all of the bruises and scars. "Laaaadies!" Mung answered, "Who's your friend?" "Oh, this is Vladimir Petrov. He's from Russland, and knows someone who grows Chervil." Mung and Schnitzel walked over to the Russian. "Hello, I'm Mung, and this is my sla-worker Schnitzel." Mung said, introducing themselves. "Radda radda ra." Schnitzel added, shaking Vladimir's hand. "Da, firm grasp comrade, very nice." Vladimir observed. "So, you know someone who sells that herb?" Mung questioned, shoving Schnitzel out of the way, making him fall into a trashcan. "RADDA!" "Sorry dear." Mung apologized. "Yeah, I do. He is a friend from military school." He answered the master chef. "Attention passengers! We are now boarding flight MA1223 with nonstop service from Marzipan City to Mooscow. We will now board rows one through twelve." The stewardess said over the intercom. "Vell, I am in row two… Apparently they had an open seat. What is your seat Chowder?" Vladimir asked, gathering his gear. "Uh, we are in the twenty-second row." Chowder somberly said. "Well, when we get in the air and reach cruising altitude, I'll come back and visit… Can't stay too long though, I have breakfast, lunch, and dinner to eat." Vladimir said. "What? You get food!" Chowder yelled. "Yeah, that's first class for you." Vladimir laughed getting into line, "Wait! I forgot to ask… How old are you?" Chowder wondered. "I am 15… See you on the other side comrade." Vladimir responded

Twenty minutes later, the twentieth through fortieth was called. "Mung, are we going to get any food?" Chowder asked, getting into the line. "Well, we will get beenuts… but that's mostly it." Mung said. "What! That's all! I'LL GO INSANE! I'LL DIE!" Chowder screamed, getting on his knees. "Oh be quiet… It's our turn… Besides, behave Chowder… The last thing we need is you making some poor flight attendant angry, thus, making them exit the plane via emergency slide, and delaying the flight!" Chowder stopped yelling and handed his ticket to the stewardess. "Alright, have a nice flight Chowder." "Uh…Thank you?" Chowder responded. "Radda." "Your welcome, enjoy your flight." Mung walked up next and gave his ticket. "Thank you, enjoy the flight Mr. Daal." "No, thank you… I must-" "Get on the plane." The stewardess said, cutting Mung off. "Fine." The trio walked through the first class, joking about how easy Vladimir had it. They eventually made it to their seats and buckled in. Mung and Chowder had their own row, while Schnitzel had a seat next to the isle. "Oh… Radda." Schnitzel relaxed. "Hey, Schnitzel! Look! I can see the ground." Chowder stated. "Radda." "Welcome aboard everyone… This is your captain speaking. We are looking at an arrival time of about five in the morning at Mooscow International Airport. It will be about fifty degrees, with a wind-chill of thirty-five. Weather will be partly cloudy, with a seventy percent chance of snowing. We are about to taxi to the runway, so sit back and relax." The pilot announced over the intercom. "Well guys, hopefully this will be fun." Mung stated, reaching for an airstore magazine. "It will be… I know it will." Chowder said confidently, reclining in his chair.

**Authors Note:** I am making a guest appearance in this; my Russian name is actually Vladimir Petrov, that's why it isn't food related. Sorry about the long first chapter… there was a lot to explain and get together in order for the story to come together. Yes, I did use a couple of real world references (News). This won't be such a serious story, more of an funny adventure. Well, hope you enjoyed, the next chapter will be coming soon.


	2. The Longest Flight

The flight took off five minutes after the pilot came on. "Well, that wasn't that bad… No one died." Mung noted, watching the shmairport disappear behind the plane.

"Yeah, now here comes the long flight to the land of snow angels, bears… and snow…" Chowder commented, looking for the flight attendant. "Mung, I'm hungry… When do I get beenuts?" He whined.

"We just took off Chowder! Relax, you'll get your food soon." Mung responded.

"Radda radda… Ra radda radda?" Schnitzel said from his row. "Yes, already. And quit complaining about the seats, they're perfectly fine." Mung stated, trying to straighten out his back.

Chowder looked out his window and saw the landmass of what is Marzipan City start to drift into darkness. "I never knew that Atlas was Scottish." Chowder said, noticing the kilt on the giant.

It was about twenty minutes before the pilot came back onto the intercom. "Attention passengers, we have reached our cruising altitude of twenty thousand feet. You now have permission to move about the cabin. The attendants will be bringing around sodas and snacks for you all. I will announce when there is two hours left."

"There, happy? They are bringing the snacks… Yes, you can have mine. I need to keep my slimming figure." Mung said.

"Yay! I won't die from starvation!" Chowder cheered. "Radda!" Schnitzel commented, picking up one of his books he bought at the store. Hopefully, he thought, this will last the flight, and he won't kill Chowder.

To Chowder, it seemed like forever before the stewardess finally reached him. "What would you like handsome." She asked. "I want a Fizzy River Juice Fruit… and can I have those beenuts." He demanded from her.

"Sure thing, coming right up!" She responded, filling the cup up with the drink and giving Chowder the beenuts. "Thank you!" He responded, ripping the bag open and eating them in five seconds. The stewardess giggled before asking Mung what he wanted. "How about you?" She asked.

"I'll take some clawfee and some sugar." Mung responded, puckering his lips. "Ok… Here is your _boiling _hot clawfee, here, I'll serve it to you." She stated, dumping the drink on the blue chef. "AHHHH! MY EYES! MY EARS! MY FACE!" He screamed, running to the restroom. "That was funny…" Chowder commented.

"What do you want Sug'?" She asked Schnitzel. "Uh… Radda radda radda." He responded. "Ah! Getting into the Russian spirit. I like that." She joked, pouring Schnitzel a glass of kvass. He took a sip of it, and immediately finished the glass. "Radda! Radda ra radda!" He chuckled. "Yes, it is a very popular drink in the Russland Federation." She explained, giving him another glass before moving on to the next passenger.

Mung finally came back from the restroom, with noticeable burn marks on his face. "Some ladies can't resist the mustache." Chowder and Schnitzel rolled their eyes.

Vladimir unbuckled his seat and headed back to the coach class of the plane. "Comrade Chowder… Really isn't that bad back here, is it?" He said, sitting down behind him in an empty seat.

"Not really, we get all the food we want, free drinks. **–**Burps- And, I think we get a movie or two. How's first?" Chowder asked, shoving yet another bag of beenuts into his trap. "Not bad either, there are too many businessmen… All they do is work on their laptops and PDA's. The food isn't that good either, I think my chicken was undercooked, I could still hear it clucking." Vladimir joked.

"Ha! Funny. Anyway, I've been wondering… What is Russland like?" Chowder wondered.

"Well, one thing… You never mention the word communism; call someone a communist, or anything of that matter… You will die. Never call anyone Ivan… you will die. Never try and kiss a girl… Well, I doubt you will have a problem with that… I'm more concerned about Mung." He looked at the chef who was talking about ladies in his sleep.

"What about the language?" Chowder asked, pointing at a bracelet he was wearing. "Oh, don't worry, I'll translate for you guys." He reassured. Chowder nodded. "Well, I have to get back to the front… It's what? Almost ten… Need some sleep."

Vladimir stood up and started walking towards the front, when he heard Chowder yell his name. "Yeah?" He responded. "Why did you leave in the first place?" asked the apprentice. Vladimir walked back and sat down in the same seat.

"That's a personally matter… Something I can't talk about." He sternly answered. "Come on… What did it have to do with?" Chowder asked, trying to get some sort of answer.

"Well… I'll tell you this… It had to do with my parents. Back when Russland was still communist, my parents were factory owners. One day, all of our machinery malfunctioned, and we couldn't produce any more products for the government. They came to our house, and hauled my father off to Siberia. Our neighbors learned of it, and they paid for my mother's trip out of the country. She went to Vineyard… Where I was born. She died five years later. I have basically spent my entire life all around the world… It's about time I saw the Motherland." Vladimir confessed, wiping a tear from his eye.

"Wow… That's… Sorry to hear about that." Chowder said, trying to find the right words.

"Thanks… But don't worry about it, I just want to have a fun time, and hopefully help you guys." Vladimir responded, punching Chowder on the shoulder. "Vell, as I said, I have to get back… Uh, I guess talk to you in a few hours." He said, finally walking back to the first class.

Chowder decided that if they would be landing during the morning, he should get some rest. He leaned his chair back, and drifted into a light sleep.

Authors Note: I'm trying a new format, recommended by a fellow author. Clears up the dialogue much better. Yes, this ENTIRE chapter was just on the plane. The next one will be one-fourth on the plane, the rest at the airport and heading to the hotel. 12 hours on a plane is brutal. Believe me. Also, the drink that Schnitzel ordered, kvass, is a non-alcoholic drink made from fermented bread, very excellent beverage.


	3. Better than Marzipan?

"This is you captain speaking… We have reached the two-hour mark. If you look out your window, you can see the country of Sushi. Local time right now is one thirty a.m. So, please, continue to enjoy the flight." The pilot announced, waking most of the passengers up.

"What? Are we there yet?" Chowder asked, rubbing his eyes. "No, not yet… Still have two miserable hours to enjoy on this flight." Mung responded, turning on the in-flight TV that was on the chair in front of him.

"Ha! They have The Kitchen! That master chef is so stupid!" Mung laughed as he watched the show. Chowder looked over at Schnitzel, who was still asleep. "He must be tired from reading that same book over and over again."

Chowder then noticed the first class curtain open, and Vladimir walking through. "Hey! How was your nap and breakfast?" Chowder asked, smiling to see his friend. "Eh, it was alright… could have slept better, and the food… Ugh! Biscuits were as hard as rocks… But, it's food." He answered.

The two talked for the rest of the time, "Alright! If everyone could return to their seats and buckle up, we are beginning the approach to Mooscow International Airport." Vladimir gave Chowder a pat on the back and walked back to his seat. Chowder looked out the window and saw the lights of Mooscow. He was amazed a the size of the city… The entire area was lit up with street and building lights.

"Wow, it looks really beautiful out there, a lot nicer than Marzipan City…" Chowder commented.

"Yeah, I guess it is. I'm just happy this flight is finally over. Now I can stretch my legs… If I can still feel them." Mung joked. "Radda ra?" Schnitzel asked, finally waking up. "Oh… Well hello sleeping beauty, yeah, we are about to land." Mung responded.

The plane touched down on the runway and taxied up to the boarding tunnel. "Velcome to the Motherland comrades!" The pilot joked over the intercom. "Uh, the local time is five ten, fifty degrees with a northeast wind. As you can see outside the window… It's snowing. If you look at the connecting flights, the flight to Hamburger is at gate B six; Tostada is at gate C seven, and Fish and Chips at A fourteen. I hoped you enjoyed the time we spent together, and thank you for flying with Marzipan Airlines."

"Now the adventure begins!" Chowder exclaimed, standing up and grabbing his bag. Mung followed and collected his bag from the overhead compartment. The line moved slowly out of the plane, and when the three emerged, they were amazed at what they saw.

"Whoa…" Chowder gasped. "Radda…" Schnitzel added. "Amazing huh?" Vladimir said, breaking the awe of the three. "Yeah, it is!" Mung stated, still looking at the airport. "Vell, if you think this is cool, wait until you see the city."

"Wait… What is this? It looks like scribbles and scrabbles… And is that a backwards three!" Chowder questioned, looking at the Russian. "It's called Cyrillic Chowder, the official language of Russland." Mung, Schnitzel, and Chowder just stared at Vladimir. "Don't worry, I'll translate." He reassured the three.

"Well, either way, I need to find a restroom… Oh, there's one!" Mung observed, running over to it. "Wait! Mung! Oh, never mind." Vladimir said, trying to stop him. "What? What's wrong?" Chowder asked. "That's… The women's restroom." He explained.

"Laaaadiessss!" Mung exclaimed. The next thing they heard was the sound of someone getting beat up. Mung came out of the restroom holding his ripped off nose, and his moustache. "My nose! My moustache! No! Why! Why me!" Mung screamed into the air.

"Sorry Mung… Dropped the ball on that one… Maybe while you're here, you hold back on the ladies thing… Marzipan City and Russland women are really different." Vladimir said, trying not to break into laughter. "Well… Can I do squats?" Mung asked. "Maybe… No."

"Fine…" Mung said disappointed. "Where are you guys staying?" Vladimir asked as they walked to the shuttle platform. "No where. We weren't able to make any reservations." Mung said. "Radda radda rad?" Schnitzel scowled the chef. "Sorry dear, we left in a hurry." Mung apologized.

"You guys can stay with me… I have a house with enough rooms for everyone." Vladimir said. Everyone cheered as a taxi pulled up. Vladimir opened the door, "Здравствуйте товарищ, как дела? (Hello comrade, how are you?)" Vladimir asked the driver. "Прекрасный, Вы? (Fine, you?)" The driver responded in a heavy accent. "Хороший, Вы можете говорить на английском языке? Мой друг здесь не может понять русский язык. (Good, can you speak English? My friend here cannot understand Russian.)" Vladimir responded.

"Da comrade! Haha! Where are you fine gentlemen from?" The driver asked as they got into the taxi. "We are from Marzipan City." Mung answered. "Marzipan huh? I've been there before, vacationed last year. Nice city, nice people." He responded, pulling out of the airport tunnel. "How about you comrade?" He asked, looking at Vladimir.

"I'm from St. Petersburg." Vladimir answered. "Ah, a comrade! Welcome back to the Motherland!" He exclaimed. "Where are you heading?" "Uh, 1414 Lenin Avenue." Vladimir stated.

Mung, Schnitzel, and Chowder were stunned by the beauty of the buildings in Mooscow, staring at all of the colors and different people walking around. "What's that?" Chowder asked, pointing at a building with spirals on top. "That's the Kremlin, the governmental house of Russia. And that area over there is the Red Square, where all of the great leaders of Russia's past are buried. The building over there is the old KGB headquarters, which was deserted after the collapse of the Soviet Union."

"Wow, a lot of history in this city…" Mung commented, still looking at the buildings… But more so drooling over the women. "Radda radda radda radda radda ra." Schnitzel added. "Yeah Vladimir, Mooscow is awesome! Do you think you could give us a tour?" Chowder asked. "I guess… But after we get you Chervil."

The taxi stopped at a medium-sized house near the middle of the city. "Alright comrade, that will be two hundred and forty rubles." The taxi driver requested. "Here you go my friend." Vladimir said, paying the driver. "Da, thank you comrade!" He said, noticing the fifty-ruble tip. "Have a wonderful time in Russland!" He added as they closed the doors and went up the steps to the house.

"You have a pretty nice house Vladimir." Mung noticed as they walked into the foyer. "Radda radda ra." Schnitzel commented, putting his bag down. "Where's the kitchen!" Chowder screamed, running through the house. "CHOWDER! SIT BOY!" Mung ordered. Chowder came to a stop and sat down on the spot. "Good boy." Mung complimented, throwing him a treat.

"Alright… Let's see, Mung, Chowder, you two can have the downstairs bedrooms, and Schnitzel, you can have the extra one upstairs. Mine is upstairs as well." Vladimir explained, leading Mung and Chowder to their rooms. "I know they are kind of small, but, they'll do." Chowder and Mung were shocked by the size of the bedrooms. Each had their own king size beds, thirty-two inch flat screen TV's, writing desk, telephones, and bathrooms.

"Very nice bedrooms!" Chowder exclaimed, jumping onto the bed. "Yeah, Vlady, nice rooms." Mung added. "What did you call me?" Vladimir asked, focusing on Mung. "Vlady…" Mung squeaked out. "Huh… That sounds cool, never been called that before, sweet. Anyway, you guys get unpacked, and I'll go get something to eat started." He said, walking out of the rooms.

"Radda radda?" Schnitzel asked as Vladimir walked past him. "Oh, right, follow me." Vladimir said, taking Schnitzel up to his room. "Radda!" He exclaimed, noticing all of the features. "Thought you guys would like it. As I told the other two, get unpacked, I'm going to be making something to eat." Schnitzel placed his clothes in the drawers and hung his suit and jackets in the closet. He walked over to the bed a laid down on it. "Radda."


	4. The Hunt for Red Chervil

Vladimir walked down the stairs and went into the kitchen. He looked at the clock and saw it was nearing six. "Huh, might as well make some stuffed pancakes." He though as he fired up the stovetop. As the stove was warming up, he looked out the window and saw the sun beginning to rise over the buildings. "Don't worry dad… I'll find out what happened to you."

Chowder was the first to show up in the kitchen, smelling the delicious meal that was being prepared. "What is that wonderful smell my nose is detecting?" Chowder asked, sitting down at the table.

"Stuffed pancakes comrade, a special dish from Russia." Vladimir explained, setting the table. "They have jam, cottage cheese, meat, and rice." He added. "Cottage cheese? That's disgusting!" Chowder whined, sticking his tongue out in disgust. "Well… If you don't like it, I guess I could make some special ones for you Chowder."

"What's going on everybody?" Mung asked as he walked into the kitchen. "Do I have to really explain again? Look at the dialogue above this one…" Mung grabbed a script and opened it to the page they were on. "Stuffed pancakes? Sounds delicious. Are they almost ready?"

"Yeah, maybe three or so more minutes." Vladimir responded, flipping the pancakes over. "Radda! Radda radda ra radda rad?" Schnitzel greeted everyone. "Here… This explains it." Mung answered, giving Schnitzel the script. "Oh! Radda rad!" Schnitzel chimed. "You've had these before? Da, very nice to see someone with excellent taste buds… And, here they are!" Vladimir stated, placing the pancakes in front of the three guests.

They all devoured the meal before Vladimir could ask how they liked them. "Wonderful! Even better than my cooking! You have to tell me how to make these, they could be a huge hit in Marzipan!" Mung exclaimed. "Sorry comrade, trade secret." Vladimir responded with a smile on his face. Chowder and Schnitzel were both still licking their plates, trying to get all of the remains as possible.

"I guess you hated it…" Vladimir joked. "Can we have more?" Chowder exclaimed, running over to the stove. "Nope, we have to start heading out… Chervil sells fast in this region." Vladimir explained, putting the dishes in the washer.

Vladimir led Mung, Schnitzel, and Chowder out the door and into the streets of Mooscow. "It's not that far from here, maybe one mile. This guy grows some of the BEST Chervil in the entire country." Vladimir stated. "So, where are we in Mooscow?" Mung questioned, looking at all of the buildings. "We are in the old military district. This used to be where all of the soldiers stayed." Vladimir responded.

"Cool!" Chowder added. "Radda radda radda ra?" Schnitzel asked. "Most of the time, this was mostly used back in Soviet Union, after the collapse, they closed the base and sold the houses." Vladimir said. "Take a left here, and it's about half a mile that way." Chowder could barley hold in his excitement as they neared his destination. "Are we there yet?" Chowder asked. "Don't even start…" Mung said.

"So, Vlady… Were you ever in the Military?" Mung finally asked. "I wasn't, on the account that I'm fifteen… But my brother was." Vladimir responded. "You have a brother?" Chowder questioned, his eyes lighting up. "Used too." Vladimir said. "Used too have a brother? What happened?" Chowder asked. "Radda!" Schnitzel scowled.

"It's fine Schnitzel… After the Soviet Union collapsed, he went back and joined the military. He was in the Air Force, MiG pilot, during the First Chechnya War. During a bombing raid, his plane was hit by a SAM and went down. He was captured by the Chechnya Guerillas, and executed on live TV. We never found his body." Vladimir explained.

They were silent the rest of the way there. "Well, here we are. D.P. Farms." Vladimir stated, pointing at the farm. "Wow, this place looks awesome! Look at all of the Chervil!" Mung exclaimed in a schoolgirl tone, making everyone look at him. "Sorry." Vladimir lead them up to the house and knocked on the door. "Da, coming!" They heard from inside.

"Vladimir! Comrade! What brings you here?" The farmer asked. "My friends here need some Chervil, and everyone knows you have the best… Think you could hook us up with some?" Vladimir asked. "Da! But, before we do anything, I must learn names!" The farmer laughed. "I'm Chowder!" "Master Chef Mung." "Radda." The trio said, introducing themselves. "Very nice to meet you, I am Dimitri Pirozhki."


	5. Trouble Abrewing

"Vlady tells me you have some of the Chervil in Russland." Mung said, leaning up next to Dimitri. "He did, did he? Vait, vhy are you so close?" Dimitri questioned, pushing Mung back to his spot. "Vlady? Ha! That's hilarious! 'Ol Vlady! That sounds like my grandpapa in Novosibirsk." Dimitri said, laughing.

"Ves, very funny, very funny… Now, where are the goods?" Vladimir asked, walking into the house. "Da, you can come in!" Dimitri joked, shoving his friend into the foyer. "Well, are you coming or not?" Dimitri asked the three chefs, who were standing out on the stairs. "Oh! Right, come on guys!" Mung said, walking into the house with Chowder and Schnitzel following.

As they went into the house, they saw pictures of Dimitri in a military uniform. "Where you in the military?" Chowder asked, pointing at one of the pictures. "Da, my purple comrade. I was in the Spetsnaz for five years. Fought in both Chechnya Wars." He explained, putting on his jacket. "So, did you now Vlady's brother?" Mung asked.

"Personally, no. But, he was one of the best pilots in the Air Force, known all over the motherland. The day we heard he had been shot down and executed was terrible. The entire country was in mourning." Dimitri added. "Hey Dimitri! Where's your duaghter… Uh, Polina?" Vladimir asked from the living room. "She's out with her friends." Dimitri answered. "Radda, ra radda radda rad?" Schnitzel asked. "I'm twenty-eight Schnitzel. Have a daughter and a beautiful wife, who… visting mother…" Dimitri answered. "Haven't we spent enough time in here, I mean, we really need that Chervil." Mung questioned. "Da, you are right comrade. Follow me."

Dimitri lead them to a barn about fifty yards behind his house. "Is this where you grow the Chervil?" Chowder asked. "Well, I would think so. Or, it could where I keep my UFO." Dimitri laughed, opening the door. "Wheres the UFO!" Chowder exclaimed, running all over the barn. "He was joking Chowder…" Mung stated.

"He's not very bright, is he?" Dimitri questioned. "Most of the time he is, just in this show he isn't." Mung explained. "Ah. Well, here you go. One bushel of the finest Chervil in the Motherland." Dimitri proudly held out to Mung. "Wow! This looks fantastic! And it taste amazing!" Dimitri proudly smiled at Mung, who was showing Schnitzel and Chowder the herb. "So, how are you doing?" Vladimir asked.

"Eh, pretty good, the shrapnel still hurts like heck, but, I'm still rolling." Dimitri laughed. "That's good to hear comrade. How's the wife?" "She's fine, visiting her mother in Siberia… Ugh, I vonder what 'advice' she is giving to her." Dimitri stated. "Probably to come live with the polar bears." Vladimir laughed.

"Well, we got our Chervil! Can we take that tour now?" Chowder enthustistically asked. "Da, Chowder, we can… You want to come along Dimitri?" Vladimir asked. "A tour provided by the wonderful Vlady?" I couldn't resist such a rare and golden opportunity!" He sarcastically joked.

"Shut it… anyway, where we are now is the old farmer's district." Vladimir stated. "Wait, so, is most of this stuff an old district of some sort?" Mung asked. "Well, most of it is… I mean, each part of Mooscow had it's own responsibility. But after the collapse of the Union, well, they just became living area's for many of the residents who were exiled." Vladimir explained.

"Wow, this is WAY different from Marzipan City…. By the way Mung, don't you think you should give Truffles a call and tell her that we have the Chervil." Chowder stated. "NO!" Mung screamed. "If we tell her that we have the Chervil, she will expect us back… I want more time with the laddddiess!" He added. "Oh, ok… And I'm pretty sure you've had enough ladies… I mean, you are pretty old. And I mean really really really really," "Chowder…" "Really really really really really," Chowder!" "really really," "CHOWDER!" "Huh? What?" Chowder responded, snapping out of his trance.

"Go to your room." Mung said, squeezing his brow. "But, I'm not at home." Chowder whined. "Then go find a box or something!" Mung yelled. "Radda radda?" Schnitzel asked. "Nah, this is funny… Better than cable!" Dimitri said, as they stood off to the side and watched Mung and Chowder fight. "If you—" "Papa!" They heard a female yell. "Ah! Polina! Did you have fun with your friends?" Dimitri asked his daughter. "I did, we went to the cinema, and then to the mall, I bought some new dresses." Polina exclaimed, opening the bag.

"Wait… Who says cinema anymore?" Mung questioned. "Apparently she… Wow!" Chowder suddenly said, seeing how beautiful Polina was. She noticed Chowder looking at her and walked over to him. "Hi! I'm Polina." Che greeted, holding out her hand. "I'm redwohc…. I mean, I'm Chowder." He stuttered. "Nice to meet you Chowder… Cute name." She giggled.

"Uh… Yeah… Same here." Chowder said nervoulsy. "Comrade! You have to learn to speak to a woman if you want to go anywhere!" Vladimir said, laughing at how nervous Chowder was. "Yeah, I… Wait! Chowder!" Dimitri almost yelled at the apprentice. "What do you think you are doing?" He demanded. "Nothing! I just met her!" Chowder whimpered. "Don't get any crazy ideas… If you do, you'll get a one way ticket to wonderful Siberia!" He scowled.

The adults walked off, leaving the two alone. "Well, better follow them." Chowder reccomended. "Yeah, don't vant to get lost here. So, Chowder, what do you do?" She asked. "I'm an apprentice chef from Marzipan City. The blue old guy, Mung Daal, is my master." Chowder proudly said. "That's cool. So, you know how to make any good meals?" Polina wondered. "Somewhat, as long as the building we are in has no value to you what so ever." Chowder joked. "Funny… I bet a chef like you has a lot of girlfriends huh?" She laughed. "Nah, I don't…" Chowder said.

-Back in Marzipan City-

Panini was working on the days order when she suddenly felt cold… "Weird, I feel… A disturbance in the force." She tried to figure out what it was, when it suddenly hit her, "I'm going to kill him."

**Authors note:** About time some humor reappeared. I was going to describe Polina in this chapter, but, better save it for when Chowder has to fess up to Panini. Yeah, I know, it's becoming about every two days I update… School sucks.


	6. Someone's Gonna Pay

-Near Red Square, Russland-

"And so, that is how we hired Schnitzel." Mung explained to Chowder as he stared at Schnitzel. "Radda radda!" "Yes, I told him that too." Mung added. Chowder was only slightly listening, he was too focused on Polina, who was standing next to Dimitri.

"How long were you guys planning on staying here?" Vladimir asked. "Well, we planned on a week, that was because we didn't know where the herb was. But since we got it so early, we still have six days to ourselves!" Mung exclaimed, hopping up and down like a schoolgirl.

"Does he normally do that?" Polina asked Chowder. "Only on threesday…" He explained. "Wow, you seem to have an exciting life Chowder, wish I did…" Polina said. "What do you mean?" "Well, my papa is kinda of over protective of me, always making sure I don't get my heart broken or something stupid like that, so… My life kinda stinks" She answered.

"I only do it because I love you… You're my daughter, and my baby. It's a natural instinct." Dimitri responded to his daughter. "Da, too bad your natural-" Vladimir started. "That vas one time. One time! And you never let me live it down!" Dimitri yelled at his friend. "Vell, it's hard to let you forget it." Vladimir joked.

"Radda radda rad radda ra radda." Schnitzel said. "I guess… Hey, Vladimir, where is a phone we can use?" Mung asked. "Uh, let me think… Ah! There is vone at the river station!" Vladimir answered, ushering the group towards the center of Mooscow.

"So, you don't have a girlfriend? That's interesting…" Polina observed. "Yeah, amazing huh? I mean, I was born beautiful… Sometimes gotta beat the women off of me with a stick." Chowder lied, puffing his chest out. "Cute, Chowder, very cute." Polina giggled, grabbing Chowder's hand. "Whoa! What are you doing?" Chowder whispered, watching Dimitri to make sure he didn't see.

"What? I can't hold hands with you? I thought you liked me." She whined, looking at him with puppy eyes. "Wha? I do… I just like living much more." Chowder paniced. "You'll be fine. Just don't be stupid." Polina joked. Vladimir and Dimitri pointed towards a large glass building. "There it is comrades… Речной вокзал… North River Terminal… built in 1937, it's the oldest canal passenger station. There should be a pay phone inside."

"Wow! This place is…" Mung started. "Let me guess, amazing?" Dimitri said. "Yeah, how did you know?" Mung questioned. "Read the script." He answered. "Right. Schnitzel, Chowder, come with me… We gotta call home." Mung ordered the others. "Radda." Schnitzel mumbled. "Fine…" Chowder added.

"Let's see… What's the number?" Mung mumbled to himself. "867-5309!" Chowder happily sung out. "No Chowder! Not… Dang it! Now I have that song stuck in my head… Let's try this… 111-1111… Truffles? Darn! 111-1112! Truffles? Darn!" Schnitzel sighed and picked Mung up. "111-1… Hey, what are you doing?" Mung yelled at his worker. "Radda radda radda ra radda ra." Schnitzel said. "Oh, really? Huh… Never thought to look at our business card…" Mung stated rubbing the back of his head.

-Marzipan City-

"Mung Daal's Catering Company… Where the food is perfect because Mung does all the cooking." Truffles greeted with a snicker. "Hey! It is, and you know it!" Mung shouted into his side of the phone. "Mung! Do you have the Chervil!" Truffles asked. "Hello to you too… And yes, I do." Mung responded.

"Well, are you coming home soon so you can make the dish?" Truffle questioned her husband, starting to drool over the amount of money they would make. "Well… Not right now, we met some men named Dimitri and Vladimir, and they are giving us a tour of Mooscow and the surrounding area… So… We will be home soon." Mung quickly said.

"WHAT! MUNG… Get back her n…" Truffles started, but was interrupted by the front door being slammed open. "Give… me… the phone…. Now!" Panini screamed at Truffles. "Dear, you don't have to yell…" Truffles responded, rubbing her ear. She handed Panini the phone and flew out of the room. "Put Chowder on!" Panini said to Mung. "Panini? How did you, where did you?" "Don't ask questions! Just put him on." She said again.

"Ok, Chowder, someone wants to talk to you." Mung told his apprentice. "Who is it?" Chowder asked, putting the phone up to his ear. "Oh… you're about to find out." Mung laughed. "Hel—" "Chowder! What did I tell you!" Panini screamed at Chowder. "What are you… oh… Right… crud." Chowder whimpered. "Wait, how did you know?" He asked. "I just do… I'm… Very powerful… Who is she, and is she prettier than me?" Panini questioned.

"Well, her name is Polina Pirozhki, uh… She's about as tall as I am, maybe an inch shorter, she has blonde hair, brown eyes, she's tan, and a lot nicer than you. So… Yeah, she is prettier than you" Chowder bravely said. All Chowder received was just silence on the other end. "Chowder? Vhat's going on?" Polina asked, walking up behind him. "I think we are all about to die." Chowder blankly stated.

Authors Note: Well, that two-day thing was a lie… Junior year is hell, and a lot of homework, and a lot of vacationing brain cells… So, most likely it will be every weekend, when my brain actually functions like normal. See, told you I would describe Polina. And yes, there is a Family Guy reference in this chapter. Next one will be up soon!


	7. The Storm Approaches

"Chowder dear, can you put Mung back on?" Truffles asked Chowder after she picked up the phone from the floor. "Ok… Wait, before I do… What happened to Panini?" Chowder questioned. "Oh, she dropped the phone and ran out crying about something… I don't know." Truffles responded.

"Oh… Ok… Uh, here's Mung." He said as he handed the phone to Mung. "Yes, sweetie bun?" Mung said. "Well… We haven't got any new orders yet, so, I guess have fun in Mooscow… Because when you get back, you are going to WORK!" Truffles screamed into the phone. "Yes dear." Mung quickly responded, hanging up the phone.

"Well, we get to have fun for the rest of the week… So, let's make the best of it." Mung happily squealed, starting to dance. "What is he doing?" Chowder asked Schnitzel, who was covering his eyes while shaking his head. "Radda radda radda ra, radda radda rad radda." Schnitzel explained, still watching Mung dance. "Well, I hope he stops soon… I'm getting eye burns… And those are dangerous." Dimitri and Vladimir returned from the information desk in time to see Mung finishing his dance.

"Somehow… I kind of vant to know vhat that vas about… But, then again, I don't… Very nice dance moves though. So, is your wife going to let you stay for alittle bit?" Vladimir laughed, patting Mung on the back. "Yeah, as long as we stay out of trouble. But, for a sophisticated man like me… that shouldn't be a problem." Mung proudly proclaimed. "Oh radda…" Schnitzel said. "Ha… Sure comrade, sure… So, question… How do you feel about flying in a fighter jet?"

Chowder looked at Polina with concerned eyes. "Da, don't worry Chowder! It's an Air Force expedition that takes place every 2nd month of the year. My papa is one of the Russian Knights, a performance flight squadron that does stunts for the crowd… It's very exciting to watch. And since he has one of the planes with two seats, he can take you guys up with him." Polina happily explained.

"Really? That's awesome! Mung, can we go!" Chowder asked, jumping up and down. "Well… I don't know… What do you think Schnitzel?" Mung asked. What he got as an answer was Schnitzel dressed in flight gear holding a helmet. "Radda!" Schnitzel barked. "Vell, I guess he wants to go. Are you guys in or not?" Dimitri asked, starting to walk towards the door. "I guess we have no choice, huh Chowder?" Mung said to his apprentice. "I guess not… Well Polina, I guess you get to see me scream like a girl." Chowder nervously joked. "I guess I do, but don't worry, I'll still think you're a man." Polina responded.

"Ve do need to do a back ground check on you... Have you ever been arrested?" Vladimir asked the three boys. "Uh... Once, though, I don't actually think it was a legit arrest... Sort of a waste of eleven minutes... Entertaining though." Mung answered. "Vell, vhat was the reason?" Vladimir questioned. "We don't really know... I think it was about some chocolate pudding or something..." Chowder said. "Yeah... It was... _Endive..._" Mung sneered. "Vhat was that?" Dimitiri quickly asked. "What was what?" Chowder asked.

"Say Endive again." Dimitri told Mung. "Never! I will never let that woman's name escape my lips!" Mung proclaimed. "Whose name?" Vladimir asked. "_Endive..._" Mung sneered again. "That! Vhat vas that?" Dimitri yelled. "Oh, that... It's... I guess you could say Mung's... catchphrase or something, Schnitzel and I have been trying to figure it out for three seasons... We have figured he might not like her to well... But, it's open to other interpretations ." Chowder explained. "Radda." Schnitzel added. "Weird... But unique. Vlady, can you flag down a cab?" Dimitri asked his comrade. "Da. And call me that again... You get to go to Siberia, heard it's nice this time of year." Vladimir responded, waving his hand.

-Marzipan City-

"Panini dear? What are today's orders?" Ms. Endive asked her apprentice. "What? Oh… Um…" Panini answered, trying to regain focus after thinking about Chowder and Polina. "Uh… Peimeni." Panini perfectly pronounced. "A Russian dish? Why would anyone want a Russian dish? Especially in Marzipan City?" Ms. Endive started to rant. "It's worth a lot of money m'am… I think maybe in the thousands… It's a rarity in Russland." Panini explained to her master.

"Really? Well, I guess only a sophisticated catering company could make a dish of this greatness… Let's see… Going to consult my book of rare dishes…" Endive stated, making Panini roll her eyes. "What? Are you serious! Arghh!" Ms. Endive growled, throwing the book out the window. "What is it m'am?" Panini asked. "We need… Chervil… Which means… Ugh… We have to go to Russland." Endive gloomily explained, slumping down onto the floor. Panini realized the significance in this situation.

"Come on Ms. Endive… Don't you want to make money?" Panini started, trying to convince her to go. "No…" Ms. Endive responded. "Uh… See the world?" "No…" Panini was starting to run out of reasons… "Wait! Maybe, just maybe… you could meet a man…" Panini stated in her most romantic voice. Before she could gather her thoughts, Endive had already thrown her in the car. "Wait! I need to pack!" Panini yelled.

"Oh be quiet! You never change clothes anyway!" Ms. Endive responded from her room. Panini leaned back into the seat and half-closed her eyes. "Well, I guess I get to meet this Polina girl after all… And teach Chowder a lesson he will _never _forget."

**Authors Note:** Yeah, I know… I guess some of you wanted Panini to stay out of the story line, but they had to eventually make an appearance in Russia. What will the trio think of Ms. Endive and Panini's sudden arrival? Will Chowder puke in the 70-million dollap aircraft? Will Mung ever get a life? Find out in the next exciting (somewhat) who said that? Anyway… Chapter of To Russland with Mung!


	8. A Turn for the Better, or Worst?

-Kubinka Air Force Base-

"Vell, there they are my comrades. The MiG-29, the fastest, most advance air-superiority fighter in the world." Dimitri proudly proclaimed. "Kind of weird how just an ocean away, we find a country that has a military." Mung observed, rubbing the side of the plane. "Vell, when your neighboring countries are alvays threating you… You have to have some sort of defense." Vladimir stated.

"Radda radda ra? Radda radda radda." Schnitzel asked, wondering what he meant. "Mostly taking place after the Second Georgian War, a lot of the European countries scowled our great Russland, and thus, we had to take precautionary measures." Dimitri answered, opening the cockpit to start the preflight checklist. "Mung, Schnitzel, if you would follow me, I'll get the flight gear for you… Chowder? Are you flying now or later? I can take you up separately." Vladimir yelled.

"I'll meet you over there in a minute…" Chowder answered, waving his hand at him. "Vell, how do you like the Motherland so far?" Polina asked. "I like it, people are friendly, there is lots of food, and I'm free from any sort of mad women who might try and cramp my style." Chowder laughed. "Good answer, to tell you the truth, my life was nothing but a drag before you showed up. I mean, all I ever did was go to the mall, study, sleep, eat, see my friends over and over again, but, when I met you, I felt, strange… Like, we were meant to meet."

Polina leaned her head on his shoulder, making Chowder smile as they watched Mung and Schnitzel get ready. "Are you sure this doesn't make my butt look big?" Mung asked Vladimir. "No, comrade! In fact, it makes you look fine for the ladies." He added, drawing a laugh from everyone. "I know, they can't resist my girlish figure." Mung commented.

Vladimir brought Chowder his flight suit and helped him get it on. "So, what are we going to do?" Chowder questioned Vladimir. "Vell—" Vladimir started before Dimitri cut him off. "Ve are going to do a vertical take-off, pull about twelve g's, do some stunts, and then hit mach three. So, some fun stuff." He explained. "Twelve g's? Man, you're going to drag the barf right out of them, if not rip their eyeball's out." Vladimir joked. "What? I've already lost my eyeball's too many times." Chowder whined. "Oh, grow up Chowder!" Mung responded. "I have, remember the special we had?" Chowder asked. "Radda…" Schnitzel mumbled.

"Anyway, ve have to vait for the clouds to clear up, vhich should be maybe half an hour… So, just go make yourself at home in the hangar… And Polina?" Dimitri said. "Yes papa?" Polina asked. "Behave while we are gone, remember, Chowder is a visitor, not a citizen… The judicial system doesn't like foreigners… Besides… I feel he is about to have the ultimate decision put upon him." Dimitri solemnly predicated.

-Mooscow International Airport-

"Ugh, this place is dreadful." Endive commented, drawing the attention from some of the passer-bys. "M'am, maybe you shouldn't say things like that, I don't think the locals like it." Panini said to her master. "Oh dear, these Russians won't do anything to a sophisticated woman like me." Endive responded. "You're a woman? Didn't know… though you vere a whale." Someone stated, drawing the attention of Endive.

"Who said that? Who?" Endive shouted at no one in particular. "Well, let's go Panini, we need to find a cab… Or a limo…" She commanded. But Panini wasn't really listening… All she could think about was finding Chowder. "Panini!" Endive shouted. "What? Oh, right. Uh, here, let me grab your bags for you… M'am." Panini stubbornly stated. "Thank you dear. Ah, here is a taxi." Endive commented, watching the yellow cab pull up.

The two got in and closed the door. "Vhere to comrades?" The driver asked. "Any place that has Chervil… And let's be quick about it!" Endive ordered the driver. "…Right away, comrade…" The driver mumbled. "Wow! This place is beautiful!" Panini commented, looking at all of the surrounding buildings and statues. "Da comrade, Mooscow is rated as one of the most beautiful and historical cities in all of the world."

"And all of the men look delicious." Endive seductively said. "Ugh… Another one." The driver mumbled, hoping the two girls didn't hear him. "What?" Endive asked. "Nothing, just reading a street sign." The driver quickly responded. The two passengers were still taking in all the sights when they heard the rush of engines fly over the cab.

"What was that?" Panini screamed, ducking on the floor of the cab. "Ha! Don't worry friend. Those are just the MiG-29's from Kubinka, an air base outside Mooscow. The Air Force is doing exhibit flights and showing off our great nations air power." The driver proudly explained, watching the planes do a fly-over of the Kremlin.

"Vell, here we are. Mooscow South District Farmer's Market, vhere you can get some of the freshest Chervil in Russland." The driver stated. "Thank you, have a nice day!" Panini happily said. Ms. Endive was already running through the stands looking for the herb. She went over and sat down on a bench. "Such a great city, everything is so colorful, just like Marzipan." Panini said out loud.

"Are you talking about Marzipan City?" She heard a voice ask from behind. "Yeah, and who might be—" She stopped, noticing the person who was asking. "Uh… Yes, I was talking about Marzipan City." She quickly answered, jumping up from the bench and straightening her dress. "Sorry if I startled you, I'm Nikolai Lenin." The boy said, introducing himself. "H… Hi, I'm uh, Panini." She struggled to say, feeling her stomach fill with butterflies.

"I've been to Marzipan before, nice place, veird names for everything thought, it was all named after food for some reason… Anyway, vhat are you doing here in the great motherland of Russia?" Nikolai asked the nervous girl. "My um, master, is looking for Chervil." She answered. "Your master? Are you an apprentice by any chance?" He asked. "Yeah, I'm a chef's apprentice." Panini stated. "Awesome. I've always vanted to be a chef. Kind of a dream I've had. Listen, I know ve just met and all, but, if you're not busy, you vant a tour of the city?" Nikolai asked. "Yes! I'd love to, but let me go ask Ms. Endive real quick." Panini responded, running through the market. "That boy was so cute! Wait! Panini, you can't like him! You love Chowder… But… then, what is this that I am feeling?" She asked herself.


	9. Two Familiar Faces

"Bear two-six, you are clear for take-off." The flight controller crackled over the radio. "Roger that tower, copy again, vertical take-off?" Dimitri asked, causing Mung to stare in shock. "What's a vertical takeoff?" Mung quickly questioned. "Oh, nothing…" Dimitri slyly answered, throttling the jet to a full blast, then yanking down on the joystick, causing the jet to pull a ninety-degree turn upward.

"OH MY—" Mung screamed into his headset, causing Dimitri to laugh. "Da! It's exciting! Do you feel the funny?" Dimitri asked the scared chef. "I feel something, and it's not tasting too well!" Mung answered, covering his mouth. "Not in the jet!" Dimitri quickly yelled. The jet began stall out, dropping in altitude. "Is it suppose to do this?" Mung screamed. "Da! And stop yelling! I'm going deaf. It's perfectly fine, besides, ready for some G's?" "G's?" Mung squeaked out. Dimitri snickered to himself as he turned the jet towards Mooscow.

-Mooscow Red Square-

"And this is the center of Mooscow, the Red Square." Nikolai stated, opening his arms. "The Red Square? Why is it called that?" Panini asked, tilting her head slightly. "Vhen Tsar Peter I came into power, he had the streltsy, or the um… 18th Century Russian Guardsmen, executed, and thus the blood shed earned this area the name "Red Square."" Nikolai explained. "Wow, that's kind of sad, but a very cool history." She said, "So… What's that building?" She asked, pointing toward the Kremlin.

"That's the Kremlin, governmental seat of the Russland, or the Russian, Federation. I think it vas established after the fall of the Soviet Union in 1989." Nikolai answered. "Wow, you know a lot of history." Panini commented, feeling her heart beat. "Eh, just something I do in my free time between my pilot training and business."

"Pilot training? Business?" She asked, falling more in love with Nikolai. "Yeah, for my pilot's license, I… vould you stop looking at me like that? It's… Veird, Making me lose focus." He asked. "Oh, sorry." Panini responded, snapping out of her trance. "Anyvay, I vant to be a pilot, just like my neighbor, a dream I've alvays have had. And as for my business, I run a computer shop, you know, um, building and repairing them." Nikolai said.

"That's awesome." Panini commented, trying to get Nikolai to look her in the eyes. "I…" She started. "Panini dear! I have the Chervil, we can get out of this forsaken country." Ms. Endive yelled from the other side of the market. "Wait! Ms. Endive, can we stay for a little bit longer?" Panini pleaded. "No, dear, unlike some people, we need to get back to Marzipan and start the dish." Ms. Endive stated.

"But, but… Ugh… Fine." Panini growled, letting go of Nikolai's hand, which, surprisingly, he hadn't noticed. "Vell, you can't use the airport comrades, it's closed due to the military needing the airspace." Nikolai explained. "What! That's insane! I have to go home! I want out of this country!" Endive yelled. "Jeez, calm down… Mad woman, anyvay, if you really need to get home, I bet someone can get you guys a flight home at the airbase." He explained, pointing towards the horizon.

-Kubinka Air Force Base-

"You ready to go, Chowder?" Vladimir asked, grabbing his helmet form the hangar shelf. "Uh, possibly, can I go to the bathroom one more time?" Chowder responded, trying to delay the inevitable. "You just vent! Like five minutes ago!" Vladimir exclaimed, "Fine, make it quick, ve are on a tight schedule, take-off time is in ten." He added, walking towards the plane. "Whew!" Chowder sighed, leaning against the wall. "Vhats vrong?" Polina asked, walking down the stairs. "Oh, nothing… Just, a little scared, that's all." Chowder explained. "Ah, you don't need to vorry Chowder, Vlad is one of the best pilots in the Junior Air Force. He'll keep you safe… Besides, I have a special gift for you when you get back." She said, hugging him.

"A gift? Cool! What is it?" Chowder quickly asked. "Don't start vith me Chowder, just get in that plane." She answered, pushing him out the door. "Fine! I'm going, I'm going." Chowder said. Vladimir was standing next to his plane when a guard ran up to him. "Uh, Vladimir Petrov?" The guard asked. "Da, vhat is it comrade?" Vladimir asked. "Someone at the front gate is asking for Dimitri, do you know vhere he is?" He asked. "Uh, he is out on a flight right now, vhat can I help with?" Vladimir asked. "The person, his name Nikolai, is vondering if they can get a special flight out for two tourist vho need to leave." The guard read from the paper. "Direct them to me, I'll see vhat I can do. Carry on." Vladimir said, dismissing the guard. "Yes sir!"

-At the main gate-

The guard arrived back at the main gate and tapped on the window of the taxi. "Uh, you have been ordered to the tarmac, please follow me." The guard said. "About time! I'm sweating like a pig back here!" Endive yelled at the guard. "Yeah, I vould think that vould happen." Nikolai mumbled. The taxi driver followed the guard to the flight line, where Vladimir was talking to his ground crew. The guard opened the door for the passengers. "Thanks." Panini said. "Da, your velcome comrade."

"So, you decided to show your face here, even after vhat you did? You have some gut Nikolai…" Vladimir said, catching all who heard off guard. "I know, I'm sorry…" Nikolai said. "… Comrade Nikolai! How have you been? Haven't seen you since basic, how's the family treating you?" Vladimir asked. "Very good, and I suppose the same for you?" Nikolai responded. "Good, uh, vho is these two?" Vladimir asked, pointing at Panini and Endive. Panini quickly ran over to Nikolai and latched onto him. "I'm Panini, Nikolai's boyfriend! And were going to be together forever and ever!" She squealed.

"Nice catch Nikolai." Vladimir said, trying not to laugh. "She's not my girlfriend, besides, we just met." Nikolai stated. "And I'm Ms. Endive. Jeez, Panini, introduce your master." Ms. Endive interrupted. "Right, sorry Ms. Endive." Panini apologized. "Ok… Nice to meet you Ms. Endive, so, vhy do you need to get out of here so fast?" Vladimir asked. "I have a dish to make, and unlike—" Endive started. "You said that already." Panini said.

"Ah, ok… Vell, Dimitri is out on a flight, and I'm about to take another person up. By that vay, Chowder! Get out here! Ve need to go." Vladimir yelled. "Right! Sorry!" Chowder responded, running out to the plane with Polina in tow. Right as Chowder reached the plane, he froze in place. "Panini?" Chowder asked. "Chowder?" Panini responded. "And this must be Polina…" Panini said, walking over to Chowder. "You have no idea what I have been through." Panini growled at Chowder. "Jeez, I just want to fly this jet…" Vladimir mumbled, slumping in his seat.

**Authors Note: **Sorry about the LONG delay… Just have had a lot of crap to get done. If some of this is confusing, yeah, tell me, I really lost track of the point I was driving at. But, yeah… So, there ya go.


	10. Time to Head Home

"Radda radda?" Schnitzel asked, drawing everyone's attention. "Hey! Where have you been?" Chowder asked the rock monster. "Uh, radda radda… Ra…" Schnitzel responded, pointing at the restrooms. "For that long? You missed a bunch of stuff." Chowder said. "Radda…" Schnitzel groaned, climbing into the jet. The shaking of the jet woke up the sleeping Russian. "Vha-? Ah, Schnitzel, you ready to go? Vhat, Chowder, vhy are you there, and he's in here?" He asked.

"I don't know, he just climbed in there… TAKE ME WITH YOU!" He screamed, trying to get away from Panini. "Vhat! Jeez, Dimitri vill be back soon, just hang on… In the mean time…" Vladimir stated, closing the cockpit and revving the engines. "Tower, this is Eagle four nine, clear for take off?" Vladimir said into his radio. "Hold, Dimtri is incoming, after his pass, hit runway four. Same takeoff?" The controller asked. "Da." Vladimir smirked.

Panini, Nikolai, Chowder, and Polina were standing in a group, trying to avoid eye contact with each other. "So, uh, who is this guy?" Chowder finally asked, breaking the silence. "This… Is my new boyfriend Chowder, a privilege you lost after you found this smut…" Panini retorted, grabbing Nikolai's hand. "I don't know vhat she is talking about… I thought ve vere just friends!" Nikolai responded. "I'm a vhat!" Polina screamed at Panini, who returned began to argue about who belonged to who.

"Dude, I'm so confused, first I come to Russland to get Chervil, then I'm at the local airbase, and now two girls are fighting over me… I guess some of Mung's charm wore off on me." Chowder joked, rubbing his chin. "Da, I am as vell… I bet living in Siberia is easier than this." Nikolai added, noticing a jet landing at the end of the runway. "Ah, that must be Dimitri, Chowder… Let's go meet them, the girls still have some fun left." He laughed.

"So, how did you enjoy the flight?" Dimtri asked Mung. "Uh huh…" Mung responded, nearly blacking out. "Aw, those g's to much for you? Come on! You get a nice pin that says I vas stupid and listened to a crazy Russian!" Dimitri exclaimed, patting Mung's helmet. "I didn't have a choice!" Mung responded, holding his barf in. "You didn't have to listen… You could have alvays pulled that lever… Yeah, that one." Dimtri instructed. Mung pulled the lever and shot out of the plane high into the air. "Excellent! Hahahaha!" He chuckled, "Ah! Vell, look vho it is! Nikolai! My old comrade!"

"Nice to see you to Dimitri, uh… Vhere's Mung?" He asked, prompting Dimtri to point upwards. "Ah, you did the lever joke huh?" Nikolai laughed, high fiving the pilot. "The lever joke? What's that?" A curious Chowder asked. "Basically, he says that the person could have left the plane by pulling that lever, vhen, in reality, it's actually an ejection seat." Nikolai explained. "Da, very entertaining." Dimtri added, grabbing his radio. "Eagle four nine, you taking off yet?" He asked his friend. "Yeah! In three… two, hang on Schnitzel, one!" Vladimir counted down, drawing everyone's attention toward the jet, where a few swore they heard a screaming man.

Ms. Endive was standing next to the cab, waiting for her flight home to arrive. "My goodness, it's cold out here! Someone get me a jacket!" She screamed at the horizon. "It's even a sunny day, and no shade! Oh, what, here's some. She said, seeing a circle of darkness around. She was suddenly hit in the head by a large object, making her fall over. "Well, at least a large object stopped my fall… What second…. Ok, uh… A large object, what do I normally call a huge object?" Mung pondered. "MUNG DAAL!" Endive yelled. "Hold on woman! I'm trying to figure out what I called a large object." Mung responded.

"Wait another second!… _Endive…_ What are you doing here!" Mung questioned, trying to get out of the seat. "Watching you make a fool of yourself!" She laughed, "But in all seriousness, I received an order for a Russian dish, and it needed Chervil. So, I came to this wasteland to get it, and now, I'm here to get a flight back to Marzipan City, so… Unlike you, I can make the dish." Endive said. "Woman! I am a better chef! And, unlike you as well, I am trying to learn the culture of this wonderful land." He retorted. "I thought you were trying to get away from Truffles?" Chowder said in the distance.

"Shut up! She can hear us… She knows all!" Mung panicked, covering his head. "What are you doing?" Endive asked. "Oh… Nothing, nothing…" Mung responded. "Dimitri walked over to where the two were standing. "Ah, you must be Ms. Endive… I'm Dimitri Petrov, commercial and ex-military pilot, at your service." Dimitri said, introducing himself. "Oh… Hello there…" Endive said romantically. "Oh boy… I know that tone of voice Dimitri, you'd better run!" Mung commented, which received a punch in the face from Endive. "Uh… yeah, so anyway… Jeez, scoot back, you're in my space Ms. Endive."

"Oh, sorry, just admiring a handsome man." She apologized. "Right, so, I can get you guys out in about two hours, the exhibition is almost over, that sound good with you?" He asked. "Oh yes, it does… Do you have a place I can get out of this cold?" She questioned. "Yeah, here, follow me." Dimitri responded. Nikolai and Chowder were still watching the girls argue. "Do you think we should say something?" Chowder finally asked. "No comrade, ve do that, and it could mess up the vhole thing, can't disturb the predator while is feasting." Nikolai explained.

"Whatever! I don't care about him anymore anyway!" Panini screamed at Polina, shocking everyone standing near them. "Fine vith me!" Polina responded, grabbing Chowder's hand and leading him to the hangar. "So, vhat happened?" Nikolai asked a disheartened Panini. "I don't know Nikolai, I really don't. First we argued about who Chowder belonged to, then who we liked, and then it just ended." Panini tried to explain. "Right… Vhoop, hold on a second. Da, this is Nikolai." He said into his radio. "Roger that, I'll tell her. Panini, Dimitri said that you'd be taking off in two hours, vant to go over to vhere they are?" He asked. "Yeah…" Panini half-answered. She started to walk with Nikolai. He noticed how sad she was, and reluctantly, held her hand.

**Author's Note: **Yeah, I know the quality of the story may be decreasing, and the updates lagging behind too, but I've been really brain dead, and no time on my hands. Due to that, I'm going to finally rap this story down in the next 2-3 chapters. Thanks to all who have watched, read, and reviewed this story.


End file.
